At most weddings, it is the father of the groom that makes a speech to celebrate the joyous occasion. However, in some exceptional cases, the Mother of the groom is also required to make a speech and pay tribute to the lucky couple. If you are reading this article, then you must be a mother whose son is getting married soon. This is an exciting time for you as a mother and you might be tasked with delivering a speech on your son’s wedding day.
Your son, who was once your little boy, has now grown up and is getting married. A wedding is not just an emotional time for the couple, it is also an intense time for the family as well, especially the parents of the bride and groom. If you want to let your son and his bride know how happy you are for them, you can write a speech that will be delivered at the wedding.
As the Mother of the Groom, there are different messages and themes that you can touch on in your speech. You can talk about how grateful you are to have such a wonderful son and an amazing daughter-in-law. You can talk about what your son was like as a boy as well.
You can also talk about love. You will have the knowledge to talk about the love that a mother has for her son. You can even talk about the love that you have for your husband. And to tie up the theme, you can talk about the love that the bride and groom have for each other.
So your son has finally grown up and has decided to take the leap of faith. It’s one of the happiest days of his life and you could not ask for a better match for him. What better way to celebrate this joyous occasion than a public display of oratory bedazzlement in front of all family members and friends. It is best to be prepared for such a moment, and if you keep a few pointers in mind, you will pull off a magnificent speech.
It is a standard practice in many customs for a parent of the groom to make a speech welcoming one and all to the wedding, celebrating the holy communion of the couple and giving the guests a brief insight into the lives of the couple as well. Weddings are happy times for everyone involved, and almost everyone is in high spirits, so public displays of celebration and excitement are always welcome.
Why Is The Mother Of The Groom Speech Special?
Traditionally, there’s not much for the groom to look forward to when it comes to the speeches. He has the pressure of delivering one, but all he gets in return is comedic abuse from the best man. But why should it just be the bride’s parents who get to mark the wedding as one of life’s special moments?
Whatever the gender of your child, their wedding is a big deal – for both of you. This deserves to be acknowledged, so make sure you grab this opportunity and give a great speech.
This means resisting the urge to start your speech with baby stories (all babies cry too much and don’t sleep enough!) or standing up and simply listing all his achievements (just dull).
Instead, paint a picture of his unique personality with your inside stories. Make people laugh but leave them in no doubt how much you love your son and his partner.
Mother Of The Groom Etiquette
Relax. There isn’t any. Just be polite and welcoming, and you’ve ticked the etiquette box.
- You don’t need to go formal or overly posh. There’s rarely a need to address the guests as ‘ladies and gentlemen’, and it can often sound too formal if you do. A simple ‘Well hello, everyone’ will suffix.
- If there are guests you haven’t yet met, then it’s worth introducing yourself as the groom’s mum.
- If you’re first on the wedding speech line up, then it’s your job to welcome everyone to the wedding. Get some humour in there early, and you’ll find you immediately relax.
- Now, a lot of parents make the mistake of thinking they need to thank certain guests, ones who have travelled far or are particularly elderly. That’s actually your son’s job, so don’t steal his thunder.
- Of course, suppose you’re giving a speech in the absence of his dad. In that case, it’s certainly worth reading our Dearly Departed blog – everything you need to know to pay a heartwarming tribute without the risk of you becoming overly emotional.
- Conclude your speech with a toast to the happy couple but make sure it’s more exciting than the usual father of the bride offering. Maybe toast ‘a lifetime of dancing on tables’?
The Structure Of Your Mother Of The Groom Speech
The Mother of the groom speech is an act of deep love towards her children, of appreciation and sincere feelings. Your main topic of the debate should be your son, and you can add some parts of his abilities and opened character with the people and with his future bride. You can also speak about your son’s marriage and the road that awaits them on this new journey.
This is the perfect occasion for some advice that brings knowledge and wisdom for all those years that are gathered from your marriage with his father. I’m pretty sure that many will appreciate it and it will find them useful for themselves, or they could really find some lost memories in your advice.
Empathy is one of the key factors that always work when delivering a mother of the groom speech and brings people together in things that they can emotionally relate to. This wedding will not have happened if it wasn’t for the best half and the impact she had on his life. So, you should give some appreciation to her as well since she is the one that influenced the groom and his life for the best. Many women contribute with some great changes to those that they love, and the people around them have often seen these changes. His bride is very important for him as he had chosen to spend his 2lifetime with her and should be of the same importance for you too since it’s for your son’s happiness.
As a mother, you were a witness to all those happy moments that the bride contributed to, and some compliments can be exactly what the newlyweds need. By sharing the beautiful moments with them and making them feel great in this day will denote that you care and it will be an atmosphere of joy for the guests as well.
Don’t forget to put some appreciation notes that involve the guests, since many of them might have travelled long distances to be here today or they’ve let other commitments to be a part of the couple’s new beginning. Also, try to remember that the family of the bride who is present to the event had contributed to the wedding as well, some appreciations will influence the course of your speech, and everyone will feel implicated.
The theme of your speech can differ according to what you had in mind. For example, you can speak in the middle part about your son’s commitment to his future wife, how the two of them met, or what are the impressions that his future bride gave you. Or, if you’d like, you can talk about your son and how he was there when the family needed him the most, here involving some traits or you can add some short stories about his life from teenage times
A groom’s mother wedding speech should always have an introductory part, a middle part and an ending part where it is usually accustomed to hold a toast on behalf of the groom and his bride. This is the moment of best wishes where you can be as original and authentic as you want. You can use the verses of a song or the lines of a movie that describe a new beginning, or even a quote or a poem that wraps all about the deep meaning of life and marriage.
Tips for your Groom’s Mother Wedding Speech
Not any day happens that your son is getting married and you are the one who has the opportunity to help him and his future wife. As a mother, you’ll always put your heart into what your children want, and that is for their benefit. Being an occasion like this, you might be asked to address a few words that will encourage the young couple in their path.
This day is one of those days that will enlighten their path, and that will change everything. The groom’s mother speech is always a speech where words should be as natural as possible and what is inside you should be revealed.
Each and every wedding speech should have a theme that goes well with the event, and the order of the words is really important in this case, as well as the whole wrapping in which you present it. Maybe this is not the first time when you speak in front of an audience. Maybe it is your second or third time, anyway in each and every situation what matters is your reaction to your flow of emotions.
As overwhelming they might be, you should be the person who owns them and not the opposite. By doing so, you’ll handle even the difficult of the most unexpected of the situations. It’s a very common situation that a parent will start crying at his son’s wedding and not to worry about a thing, because many of the guests who came to the wedding are parents as well and they will understand you.
A little advice though if you know that you are sensible, is to add a makeup that will not leave with the mascara leaking all over your face. You’ll have to be respectable in all that you are doing, and you are saying, as well as in the outfit that you are wearing, not to mention the makeup.
It is known by now that emotions can often be barriers in your path as a speaker and the best way is to reduce them to silence. A calm attitude will always solve things much quicker than being anxious all the time. You still have the attitude to overcome all those emotions by allowing yourself an extra early time to practice what you’ve written.
Mother of the Groom – The Rules
Indulge In Memories
Writing your Mother of the groom speech is a once in a lifetime opportunity. It’s your chance to dig out the old photos, memory boxes and school reports and get properly nostalgic. Indulge!
But as well as a trip down memory lane, use this time to dig up the evidence. How do childhood artefacts relate to the man he is today? Were their early indications he’d be an engineer? Or were his teachers completely wrong about him?
He’ll love the surprising insights you can reveal, as will the guests.
Don’t Forget His Partner.
Yes, there will be so much to say about your son but don’t forget the other half of the happy couple!
Whereas a father-of-the-bride may make fun of the groom in their speech, it’s not as common for anyone to make fun of the bride on ‘her big day’. Avoid this at all costs unless you’re sure they’re up for a laugh and won’t be offended. And if you have any doubt, don’t. Your son’s worked very hard to get this wife and, if you scare her off, another one may not be around for a while.
If it’s same-sex marriage, your new son-in-law may be up for a little more ribbing. Completely sexist but we’ve generally found this to still be the case.
All wedding speeches should contain an element of humour, not just the best man’s.
No one is expecting you to be a stand-up comedian so just be yourself. Avoid any ‘wedding jokes’ you’ve found on Google and instead rely on all the real, authentic stories that will make your speech memorable and meaningful.
Remember the adage ‘it’s funny because it’s true’. Pinpoint the things that make your son unique. What are his quirks? His guilty pleasures? What is he obsessed by?
Keep It Short
You’ll amaze yourself with just how much material you find once you get started on your speech but remember, brevity is the soul of wit, so be selective and keep your speech to less than six minutes.
When you’ve written your first draft, set yourself a challenge to edit it in half. Stories, jokes and speeches are all the better if they’re punchy.
Prepare To Deliver
No matter how good your speech is, it won’t sound great if you rush through it. So take your time, look at the audience and don’t mumble into the mic. If you’re not a confident speaker, read our How To Deliver Like A Pro for lots of easy, take-home tips. As ex-BBC producers and directors, we know the tricks of the presenting trade.
Tips to Remember
- Ensure that you are not too drunk while making your speech. You’ll only end up slurring your words and making a fool out of yourself for not following this rule of general wedding etiquette.
- Keeping it short and sweet would be a very good idea as well. Ideally, it should not last for more than 5 minutes. Guests tend to get bored very easily, and spending more than a few minutes listening to a speech is not something that they may prefer.
- Practice many times before the final edition. You don’t want your mind to suddenly turn blank in the middle of your speech.
- It is also highly advisable to freshen up just before you make your speech. Look your best so that you can enrapture your listeners.
- Use visual tools, like videos, photographs or even memorabilia. These will give the guests a peek into the lives of the happy couple, and they will be happier for them.
- Remember to make the speech from your heart and express feelings of appreciation towards the bride. If you’re putting on a show, everyone will know it.
Frequently Asked Questions
Briefly, thank guests and family for coming. Talk about the groom and share memories and jokes. Talk about the bride/his partner, what you know about them, and your son's happiness. Welcome the bride/his partner into the family, and give the bride and groom advice as a married couple.
On your actual wedding day, one of the major responsibilities the mother of the groom can take on is making sure that the people at the wedding they know (family and friends) are taking their seats at the ceremony on time, are all set with transportation to and from the venue, and don't get lost,
Does the mother of the groom give the bride a gift? The mother of the groom traditionally brings a small gift to the bridal shower. When it comes to the wedding itself, the mother of the groom can give the bride a more sentimental gift, like a family heirloom, to officially welcome her into the family.
The mother of the groom can give a speech or just a toast at the rehearsal dinner, as she is one of the hosts of the event. There are some details that a speech should include, such as special memories, stories about the couple, and of course, the toast.
The groom might opt to escort his mother down the aisle and to her seat in the front row, followed closely behind by the groom's father. This gives the groom an opportunity to give his parents a hug before taking his place at the altar.