The wedding toast is a tough affair. It's important to strike a balance between humour and sentiment without offending the best man or maid of honour.
The best toast you've ever given is going to be given, and you want it to go off without a hitch. You're carrying a heavy burden, but you can do it!
Topic for your toast: Most weddings have a toast presented by a relative or close friend of the bride and groom or by someone who had a significant role in the wedding's planning. What makes them such a fantastic pair should be highlighted.
It is traditional for the groom to give a speech at the reception, and many of these have become classics in the wedding tradition. Your toast should be one that everyone will remember for a long time to come.
In either case, the toasts during a wedding reception can leave a lasting impression on guests. Still, it can be difficult for anyone to know what to say and how to say it, no matter how close they are to the couple.
It may be acceptable, in the eyes of some, to wing the speech and focus on oneself rather than the couple getting married. However, if you do decide to compose a toast, put some thought into its content to ensure that your audience can relate to what you have to say.
However, while every wedding is unique, there are a few things that hold true for every single one. There are several universal truths, and one of them is that the newlyweds should receive a toast from their loved ones. If you want to give a great wedding toast, read this post.
This guide will teach you how to deliver your speech with poise and confidence, what to include in your speech, and how to wrap things up so that your audience leaves with a lasting impression.
One of the most meaningful parts of a wedding is the toast, where the couple and their guests can express their gratitude for being there and share a few words about the significance of the occasion. If you're worried about giving a great wedding toast, then read on. We've got some advice that will make the task much easier for you.
Using these guidelines, crafting a memorable speech for a wedding will be a breeze.
1. Tips
Toasts are a traditional part of any wedding celebration. It is fitting and respectful for guests to share stories about the happy couple and wish them well as they start their new life together at the celebration.
Few parts of a wedding reception are as eagerly anticipated as the beginning of the speeches. After all, the joyous occasion is a chance for everyone to recognise the special love that the bride and groom share with one another, and who better to do so than the people who are closest to them?
Everyone at the wedding looks forwards to the toasts, whether they're offered by the best man, maid of honour, or the bride's or groom's parents. There is, then, a lot riding on your ability to write a good one.
In spite of this, making a toast can be nerve-wracking. Should you be the one to offer the toast, what should you say, and how long should you speak for?
Know Your Audience
Make sure they are familiar with you...
There will most likely be some visitors there who are unfamiliar with you. You probably won't recognise many of the fiancé's friends and family if you've only met them a couple of times. First, though, you should introduce yourself.
Describe your connection to the couple in a few words for the benefit of the guests at the wedding.
It's highly improbable that you have a close personal relationship with everyone present. You should introduce yourself to the guests, but keep in mind that this event is not about you.
You shouldn't waste everyone's time by talking about yourself; they came to support the bride and groom. First, introduce yourself and the audience to the couple.
The most apparent advice for a wedding toast is to keep it short, but it's also important to bear in mind that you're addressing everyone in the room and not just the bride and groom. Personal anecdotes and heartfelt recollections are wonderful, but try to steer clear of any inside jokes that only the two of you get.
Get people's attention by bringing a memento of your time spent with the bride and groom, such as a picture or a keepsake.
Attempt to include a funny or interesting anecdote about how you first met the bride or groom. However, remember to make it brief. Begin your speech with a succinct and engaging beginning.
Honour the recipient of the toast
A toast is a celebratory drink traditionally served to congratulate and salute the newlyweds. It will be unique, touching, and long remembered by the recipient (s).
The toast will be given by someone who can talk effectively, concisely, and with the right amount of emotion. A meaningful toast will be spoken with affection, and the audience will respond positively.
Address the couple
And, of course, you shouldn't address the speech to just one individual. Even if you might feel more of a connection to one of them on this special day, it is important to celebrate both of them equally.
You can ask your friend's spouse's pals for advice or just keep track of all the great ways their partner has changed their life. Share your thoughts on the person's first impression or what was mentioned immediately following the first date.
The happy couple would appreciate hearing about such fond memories.
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Plan it Out, Tell a Story
You should never start a toast by saying how hard it was to write. Saying something like, "I wasn't sure what I was going to say today..." notifies the audience that the following few minutes will be boring and that they may go ahead and start dozing off.
Never, ever try to wing it when giving a public speech. Keep in mind that nervousness is a common problem for people who aren't used to public speaking.
For those who suffer from nervousness, preparation is key. Writing things down can help jumpstart your creativity when you're stuck. Jot down some of your most treasured recollections of time spent with the bride, groom, or both.
Insight can come from anywhere at any time. Beginning with a warm and fuzzy recollection can lead to an even cuter tale, and before you realise it, you've already covered half the ground.
Tell a tale about the bride or groom that you learned at school. When you were both 12 years old, do you remember talking about what you hoped to find in a life partner on the playground?
Can you remember what they said on their first date or describe who they were before they found love and settled down? Talk to other people and see if you can come up with any interesting tales to tell.
We recommend only using this train of thought as a springboard for further exploration. It's important for a speech to have a central idea or theme.
Determine one quality that either the bride or the groom has that you find endearing. Select narratives that illustrate your idea. Then, make an effort to link everything you say back to that quality, and don't stray too far from it.
Keep in mind that the bride and groom are the stars of the show. As a host, your goal is to ensure happiness for the happy couple and all of their guests. Therefore, leave them with some encouraging words and a memorable experience. The bride and groom put their faith in you by asking you to take on this task.
Use humour sparingly
Though we shouldn't let this session devolve into a full-on comedy show, feel free to lighten the mood with any humorous asides.
Maybe there's a hilarious (but not hurtful) story about their first impression of their partner, or they had to finally kick a terrible habit once they discovered the one. Instead of filling your speech with humiliating anecdotes, we suggest peppering it with a few well-placed jokes. Keep in mind that it's likely that Grandma will be there.
Toast-givers at weddings should keep in mind that the event is a joyous occasion. Even if it's meant to be entertaining, it must never become a farce.
Speeches given at weddings tend to be long and drawn out, full of innuendo and inside jokes that no one understands save the speaker. A toast should never be taken as an opportunity to insult the other person. Maintain a focus on warm and fuzzy recollections, praises, and sincere expressions of emotion.
Your friendship with the happy couple may be damaged if you give a toast that isn't proper.
Play to Your Strengths
Stop pretending to be someone you're not. If you're not a natural joke-teller, don't try to insert them into your toast.
Your toast will come across as insincere if you're more concerned with winning over the audience than the bride and groom. It will be obvious to everyone listening that you have the incorrect motives for addressing them. Moreover, the bride and groom will as well.
Keep in mind that the toast you give today will have a lasting impact on your friends the bride and groom. Do great things that will make you stand out in positive ways.
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Be sentimental
Telling the bride and groom how much they mean to you and how glad you are that they have found each other is the most crucial portion of the speech.
Describe your time spent together and how much they mean to you. The wedding toast is one of the few times in life when it's appropriate to express genuine joy.
Keep it Short
Some toasts, whether because the speaker is apprehensive or has an energetic personality, go on for too long. Good news for individuals who are nervous public speakers: shorter toasts can still make an impression.
Often, the simplest toast is the best toast. The "Three B's" are "Begin, Be Brief, and Be Seated," as recommended by the Protocol School of Washington for persons giving toasts. However, the accepted wisdom is that you only need one or two minutes.
You must keep in mind that "I am not performing alone". The toasts will likely be short, so please keep yours to two or three minutes.
You should adapt your time in light of the number of other speakers. People are undoubtedly itching to go on the dance floor, so it's best to err on the side of brevity.
Aim for three to five minutes. If it goes on for much longer than that, people will likely get bored. You can easily cover all of your bases in three minutes.
Do your best to slow down and enunciate if you tend to speak quickly. It would be tragic if you took the time to craft a beautiful and moving speech, only to have no one comprehend it because you spoke too quickly.
If your toast goes on for more than a few minutes, you might see individuals checking their phones.
Practice Makes Perfect
Prepare your remarks by writing them down or printing them out. Time yourself while you read it aloud rather than internally. Keep in mind that your nervousness may cause you to speak more quickly than normal.
Not everyone is expected to memorise their speech. Nobody will be expecting it, and your nervousness may get the best of you and make you blurt out something you didn't want to say. Use the same note cards you used for practise and read from them. Knowing that you are ready for this will give you more assurance.
Keep in mind that feeling anxious about the big day is natural. The next time you feel your nervousness rising, try telling yourself that you're actually enthusiastic to give your speech.
Before the big day, you should contemplate what you'll say in your toast. Though it's not a good idea to try to learn it by heart. Instead, it is recommended that you practise the phrase several times until you are familiar with the meaning. The toast will come across as more genuine and sincere if you take this step before you give it.
You'll do best to make a bulleted list and then talk easily to each of the topics on it. When in doubt, record your speech and listen to it afterwards to see if there's anything you can change.
A common saying is "Fake it 'til you make it." If you don't actually feel confident, pretend that you are. There is a good chance that nobody will notice the change. Everyone will mistake your outward displays of confidence for genuine assurance.
Keep nerves at bay
All OK, relax. You're either expected to deliver a toast or the best man, in which case you know it's coming. When all eyes are on you, it's normal to feel some apprehension. Fear not giving a toast by keeping it short and sweet.
It's customary to toast the brides with something like, "To Ellen and Amanda" at weddings. We cherish our close circle of friends. With best wishes for a lifetime of joy, laughter, and exciting new experiences together, And hope you two have a wonderful life together. Also, keep in mind that you are surrounded by friends and family who love the pair as much as you do.
Don’t panic
Fear not if you are called upon to deliver a speech! To make a toast to a dear friend or loved one is an honour, and it doesn't take as much preparation as those graded speeches you gave in school.
Prepare for public speaking by outlining your points on note cards and practising in front of a mirror. Take a deep breath and say what's on your mind; if you do that, you'll do great.
End your wedding toast perfectly
Toasting is the proper manner to conclude a toast. Raise a glass in toast to the happy couple.
As soon as you're finished speaking, turn around to face the crowd, raise your glass, direct your gaze back to the honorees, ideally sip some champagne (but any beverage will do), and take a seat.
2. A Few Don’ts
- You should never become drunk and offer a toast at a wedding. They will not be grateful, and you will likely bring shame upon yourself and the unhappy marriage.
- Do not substitute your phone for actual notecards.
Unfortunately, technological systems frequently break down. Your toast will inevitably have one of those moments in the middle of it. - Do not be crude. Children and their grandparents are in the audience. Observe the correct protocol.
- The topic of money should not be discussed.
- Neither party should bring up any exes or divorces from the past.
- Honeymoon jokes should be avoided at all costs.
3. Do’s
- Prepare. You're off to a good start by reading this because it indicates you're considering your toast in advance. Following this mental preparation with physical action will yield the best results.
- Get your message through clearly by yelling into the mic. The DJ will keep an eye on the volume, and most modern speakers will err on the side of being too quiet rather than excessively loud.
- Finish on an upbeat tone. Raise your glass and invite everyone in the room to toast the bride and groom with you.
- It's normal to feel anxious. Giving a speech in front of an audience can be nerve-racking. However, try to remember that anxiety is a normal response and spare yourself any self-blame.
- Just think, you're only losing a few minutes of your life right now. Keep in mind that you're doing this for two people who mean a lot to you. Hopefully, if you give some thought to the two of them and the love they share, you will be able to put your fears to rest.
4. 5 Wedding Toast Etiquette Considerations for the Couple
Both the limelight and the pair's desire to avoid it can bring out the best and the worst in a couple. Also possible, if opposites really do attract one other, is that one spouse thrives on attention while the other cringes at the thought of it. Here is some advise for the honoured guests so that they can enjoy the attention without feeling uncomfortable.
Listen, but don't raise your glass
Being roasted leaves one wondering what to do. Pay close attention, maintain eye contact, and react with appropriate emotions (laughter or tears) if you receive a gift. Do not, under any circumstances, toast yourself. It's important to remember that the honoree is not expected to participate in any toasts or raise their glass. In a same vein, nobody toasts themself. In a way, it's just like giving yourself a compliment.
Be familiar with toasting
Your wedding planner or emcee will be intimately familiar with your reception's schedule. Anxiety can be reduced, however, if you know what to expect and when it is going to happen. The wedding toast, for instance, typically kicks off the festivities shortly after the guests have been seated.
Once the wedding party and guests are seated (or, in the case of a standing reception, once the bride and groom have arrived and been introduced), champagne (or another sparkling non-alcoholic beverage) is poured.
Offer the toasting duty to your best man
For the first toast at your wedding reception, consider having the best man (or best lady) give his or her toast.
The best man is expected to make the opening toast. The best man's toast to the bride and groom could be made even more memorable by beginning with a quick anecdote about a special moment with the couple.
Give the person toasting a time limit
We've all gone to events where a toast is being given and it just keeps going and going. However, severing it can be difficult.
The best way to ensure that everyone who is supposed to offer a toast at the wedding meal sticks to the allotted time is to have a talk with them in advance.
Those responsible for making the toast will also likely welcome this, as they will know exactly what is expected of them, and may avoid the uncomfortable situation that arises when someone goes on for too long.
Toasting is appropriate at many wedding-centric events
While the best man traditionally gives the toast at a wedding reception, other guests are welcome to do so as well, whether at the ceremony itself or at a pre-wedding dinner, anniversary party, engagement party, or post-wedding brunch.
Toasts are an enjoyable part of many different types of events, but are most commonly connected with weddings.
Remember that the toasts are meant to celebrate the newlyweds. You can honour your place in the couple's lives by drafting and delivering a speech that shows how much they mean to you, no matter how nervous you may be.
Moreover, a heartfelt toast is a great way to kick off the reception by focusing on the happy couple and wishing them well in their future together.
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Frequently Asked Questions About Wedding Toast
Wedding Speech Opening Lines: Simple and Sincere Opening Lines. "Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and thank you (name) for the kind introduction." "Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. As (name's friend/relative), I welcome you all here tonight."
The art of the toast lies in storytelling. But the key is also making a point, so having a theme or thesis statement can help you write an engaging toast. Remember that stories should have a beginning, middle, and end. And everything you include should build to your final words and prove that theme or thesis.
Say something like “Cheers!” or “Let's raise a glass to ___,” and then lead the way by finding someone near you to clink glasses with (if you're in a small gathering) or going ahead and taking a sip from your glass (if you're in a large gathering).
T — Tell a story
There's a simple formula to a good toast: Introduce yourself, tell a story, connect that story to the event and wrap it up (time to hit the dance floor!) The biggest challenge is choosing the right story for the occasion and audience.
Commonly used phrases for the maid of honour speech ending include:
- Please raise your glasses in honour of the Bride and Groom.
- Join me in honouring the marriage of Bride and Groom!
- With love and happiness, here's to you, Bride and Groom!
- Cheers to the happy newlyweds!